The Strongest Person You Know….

She is the strongest person you know

She handles lifes difficulty with ease or so it seems.  Do you know what happens behind the scenes?

The doubt, the fear, the need ,the neglect. (She hasn’t showered in a week)

Her whole being is wrapped up in a beautiful blue eyed package. (Who always cries and never sleeps)

Her Autistic child, her life blood, her  offspring, her joy, her prison. Her legacy!

His milestones are brilliant to her,( he spoke again, he repeated, he copied,), mundane to the masses (he parrots,  he copies, no words are his), life shaking, heart breaking (he said Mommy is beautiful), leaps and bounds ahead of his disabled peers. (He doesn’t understand I love you)

Yet here she is, in tears, wanting, waiting, missing the life she had beyond the life her third child brought her into.

She blames herself, shames herself, berates herself for his affliction.

Fights for him, cries for him, is an advocate for his condition.

She has given up her friends, her job, her connections only to be his everything.

She is the strongest person you know. The mom who gives up herself for the advancement of her child.

This woman had goals, and dreams,  and a story; but gave it all up for her blue eyed boy.

 

 

Advertisements

The Artist

Her brush is but a shovel,
Her canvas a patch of dirt,
Her paints consist of the flowers and ferns that God has placed upon this Earth.
Her artwork is ever changing as the seasons come and go,
Her art is always beautiful even when sprinkled with snow
Her daughter is a musician,
her son has a talent for sketch,
Her husband is a jack of all trades and has passed on all of his gifts.
But, she does not realize her talent to create beauty every day,
Her garden is a masterpiece that is always on display.
My mother is an artist
My mother is my friend
My mother is a Survivor,
And I cherish her to no end.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Happy Mother’s Day Mom

Bonnie Jean Higgins (Carroll) 2002

lily

While Scorpio Dreams

~ The tide goes to the shore,
With each breath you take,
Steady, peaceful sleep.
And I wish I could share it with you.
Alas, I am waltzing with my demons this night.
Your face is so peaceful,
Like the serenity of a summer song.
And well, I am
That ocean that toils and churns,
Never sleeping, ever moving.
And I wonder what dreams you are dreaming,
As I sit here in the candlelight
And watch you sleep. ~

B.J.H. 09-19-2014

A Few Simple Words

I write to you
But the words are never right
I start and stop
Scribble, scratch
And throw away page after page
Of frustration
My heart is full of emotions
My mind is a kaleidoscope of pictures
And I, A POET!
Cannot find the words to express them
I will never stop my quest
To capture the perfect words
That express what I feel in my soul
And see when I close my eyes
Until then
I offer you a few simple words
I love you……

B.J.H.
April 2014
Dedicated to certain Scorpio… I adore you P.J.C.

Beamer’s Knob

~ Beamer’s Knob ~

Just past dusk
fireflies sparkling
Against a majestic wood
A little girl
Just about five
Screams in delight
At the moonlit night
Great Uncle and Dad
Talking game
The little girl
Trying to catch night-bugs in vain
Beagle puppies barking
And chasing shoestrings
As she rolls down a steep hill
Giggling
Laughing
A starry eyed girl
Mom and Grandma in the kitchen
Little brother by Daddy’s hand
The little girl laying in the grass
Falls in love with the stars.

B.J.H.
02-13-2003

This poem was wrote about my Great Uncle Ballard’s Beamer place on Beamer’s Knob.  This is dedicated to my Great Uncle Ballard and my Grandmother Higgins who have both passed on to the Summerlands.